Click for Right Human Relations
A FATHER AND
his son lived in a chaotic country. The father waited for the right opportunity to teach his son to live properly while in troubled times. The opportunity came when a band of bandits attacked and looted their village, then disappeared swiftly. The son wanted to join the enraged crowd in the street, but his father told him, “Stand at the window and look out. See that man with the angry face? Do you want to destroy yourself with anger?”
“No,” said the son.
“Observe that man over there who is actually trembling with fear. Do you want to go through life being afraid?”
The son replied, “I do not.”
“Notice that man who is running round with frantic jerks of his arms,” said the father. “Do you want to be a person with no control over himself?”
“No, I do not want to be out of control,” assured the son. The young man sensed that his father was trying to tell him something of supreme importance, but could not quite grasp the complete meaning. The next day he asked, “What was behind your words yesterday?”
His father told him, “Never let mechanical people tell you how to respond to any kind of event. Respond from your own essence, for that is the only healthy response. Then you will not be a helpless leaf tossed about by every passing wind, which is the way most people live — and suffer. Live only from your true nature.”
Infidelity is definitely not a new issue for couples…
Unfaithfulness—major problem in relationships since the beginning of time. And has always been in the history of romance. also in the Bible.
The first step a couple may take in recovering from infidelity is to determine if the relationship should be or can return to sanity.
The following are seven critical questions you need to ask yourself and your partner to know if your relationship might survive.
1.) Is the situation isolated, or is it a pattern. In other words, has the unfaithful partner shown patterns of infidelity or unfaithful behaviors in the past, or is this disloyalty a one-time thing?
2.) Do you feel that your spouse owns up to what they have done, or do they make excuses?
3.) Do they understand exactly what this has done to you, and how much they have hurt you? Do they realize the gravity of the situation?
4.) Are they truly sorry for the choice that they made, or are they just sorry that they were caught?
5.) Is this person willing to clean up the mess, and do what it takes to mend what they have done? Or, do they just want to forget about it and move on? Are they willing to give up their freedom to enable you to trust them again?
6.) Is doing this out of character for your partner, or are they insensitive in other areas of your relationship together? Do they really care about how you feel or about your well being?
7.) Is infidelity a part of their legacy? Did they grow up like this, or is this new behavior for them that is not present in their past, including family and past relationships?
Think about what these questions mean to you and to the survival of your
relationship. Be careful not to lie to yourself about the situation…
Ask yourself these 7 questions honestly. Don’t be afraid to seek out professional help, and talk to them about the questions above. The biggest decision for you to make on the road ahead, is whether or not you should try to save your relationship.
End a Thousand Difficulties
We all too often panic in a crisis because of a wrong reaction. The main wrong reaction is to think the crisis has an exterior cause, when in fact a personal crisis is a personal crisis. (Be it food, medical or hereditary) The corrective course in any crisis is to react with the thought, “Something is unnecessarily agitating within me.” Insight into pointless agitation ends it, for no man/woman consciously agitates themselves. In this way you do not find an answer to a crisis; you dissolve the crisis constipating you!
One cause of guilt and frustration is the inability to tell the difference between man-made laws and spiritual laws, which are often opposed to each other. Self-awareness sweeps out this problem once and for all times. The self-illuminated man/woman knows just what to do in every situation involving various laws, for spiritual rightness understands and transcends human wrong.
about the need for right motives. A motive is the seed which determines the quality of the fruit. It is a wonderfully right motive to wish to know right and wrong from your own self driven mind, not from what others tell you is right and wrong. Consider the motives of two kinds of public speakers. An unawakened man/woman speaks to convince himself that his illusions are realities. The enlightened man speaks to show others that their realities are illusions.
Have you ever thought of words as petty dictators which command you to feel dejected or defeated? That is what they are, which means you must no longer let mere words rise up and tell you how to feel. Don’t let the word “weakness” arouse feelings of shame; don’t let “failure” frighten you. Our emotional responses to words are unconscious, which means we must alertly notice how a word arouses a feeling. Be aware of the mechanical process, for this ends the power of words to whip you about.
Imagine a printing press turning out newspapers having several spelling mistakes in the headlines. Workmen grab the emerging papers and frantically try to make corrections — but no one thinks to correct the single cause of all the mistakes, which is the printing press itself. No printer would make that kind of error, but society does it every day by trying to correct effects instead of causes. Unconsciousness is the faulty printing press; consciousness is the correction.
One flash of insight can clear up a thousand difficulties. Pete J., who was faced with domestic difficulties, could see no way out. However, Pete knew enough to work at clarifying his own mind. When he changed his attitude towards the difficulties, their power over him disappeared. At a group meeting he stated, “Where is the answer to a problem? I found out. It is above the mind that argues back and forth about it.”
Citizenship in the Spiritual Kingdom liberates us from wordly grief, just as a citizen of a South American country is uninvolved with the problems of a European nation.